How I got started with losing "the weight"

(2013 ---> 2018)

Let me preface this with saying

"I IN NO WAY AM SHAMING ANYONE FOR BEING ANY SIZE. THIS IS MY STORY. TAKE FROM IT WHAT YOU WANT AND DISCARD WHAT YOU DON'T AGREE WITH."

I was 21 years old and reading an online article about weight loss because I knew I had a little bit of weight to lose...what I didn't know was that the chart attached was about to tell me my starting point was obese. It had 3 sections and it was separated by weight and height.

First section 'healthy weight range', second section 'overweight weight range' and third section 'obese weight range.'

I had just weighed myself a few days prior and it showed 212lbs. I was stunned. I could not believe the number I was reading. Yes, I had been bingeing again but was I really bingeing for that long of a period of time..this time.

How had I let it go this far? Again.

So when I was looking up all the things on Pinterest on how to lose weight, this article popped up with that chart and I immediately realized I was in the Obese category now. I was no longer overweight. Now I was classified as obese as a 21 year old young adult...to say I was mortified is an understatement. I just felt so defeated and again, like I mentioned above STUNNED!

As I took in all of this news that broke my heart, I decided to be proactive about it and at least TRY to get my life back on track. I desperately started typing into my keyboard to find a solution online. I was searching and searching and honestly I think I was really just looking for an article that would give me some sort of reimbursement for my weight gain.

Like 'Hey, we know you didn't mean to gain all of that weight so we are going to take back the last 20 you packed on to give you a headstart.' That is what I wanted. I didn't want to start from zero again. I didn't want to have to go back to square one again.

But it was necessary and I now thank myself for it.

This struggle I went through at such a young age got me to where I am now. I quit the hair industry to pursue online health coaching...like how cool is that?

Who knew that that 21 year old gal that was freaking out over a silly obesity chart was on the verge of changing her life and paying it forward once she found what worked. And boy, did it take me a hot minute to find what worked for me.

MISTAKE #1

I was desperate. I just wanted to lose the weight and I didn't care how I did it. I went from diet pills, to hormone injections, to meal replacement shakes, to calorie restriction, and to abusing fitness by overtraining. I had no direction and since my goals were out of fear, I fell for everything that said I would be "skinny".

HOW TO NOT MAKE THAT MISTAKE?

Make a list of the reasons you want to get healthier.

Make another list of how getting healthier will make you feel.

Write a letter to yourself, forgiving yourself for your past and make peace with where you are right now. This will help you cope and make wise decisions when it comes to changing your lifestyle. Reality is, if you don't accept and love yourself where you start...chances are you will not love yourself when you get to where you want to be. I dealt with that as well.

MISTAKE #2

I originally started this journey for someone else. Actually multiple people. I was back into the dating game soooo you know how that goes. I wanted to be confident. But basically only so I could go on dates and out of insecurity, be loved.

HOW TO NOT MAKE THAT MISTAKE

Make a vow that you are doing this for you!

For your freaking goddess-like lovable babe body.

No one else. BUT FOR YOU. And remind yourself that throughout the rest of your life. Own it. Know it. Name it. Do it. Just be there for yourself like you would be there for your bff.

MISTAKE #3

I COMPARED EVERYTHING ABOUT MY HEALTH JOURNEY TO OTHERS...

This held me back in so many ways. I constantly was envious of others results. It killed me to see people that were already fit. It was so hard to understand that I was not less than because I had extra weight. I was trying and that effort is immeasurable. You can't put a time crunch on changing your life. Habits take time to evolve and so does building a new body. It takes time. I would compare my chapter 1 to someones chapter 35. Not fair.

HOW TO NOT MAKE THAT MISTAKE

Especially with social media being so huge, this is a tough one but it is necessary. Protect your space. Anyone that you find yourself comparing yourself to in a negative way, like wishing you looked like them or feeling less than when you see their posts...UNFOLLOW. Or distance yourself. Even if that is me (which I hope not because I do my best to make sure everyone knows there is nothing magical about what I did...I just did it). You need inspo that lifts you up and makes you feel like you can do it too. In addition to that, keep reminding yourself of your capability and also discipline to keep going. Remind yourself where you are at. Keep a journal of your days or track how long you have been at it.

"Today is the second workout I have completed all year. I feel sore but I feel happy for moving my body and am patient with the process"

Something like that ;)

MISTAKE #4

I was not willing to readjust while I was changing.

The goals I had when I first started are not even close to the goals I have now. I didn't realize that as I started this...I was about to get comfortable with things about myself I never was once. I never thought I would accept and welcome my stretch marks or be ok with my legs jiggling while jumping up and down during a workout. MY goals at the beginning were to be perfect (lol) like the perfect body type and weigh like 130lbs. 5 years later, I am not 130lbs and I am ok with that.

HOW TO NOT MAKE THAT MISTAKE

This is simple. Just have open arms and eyes. Be ready for the unexpected and anything that initially turns you on, go for it.

Example: I was asked to do a boudoir shoot recently and that excited me at first when I was asked and then fear crept in a little bit. I started to get nervous about being in front of the camera. Vulnerable. Raw. But then I remembered my immediate feeling towards it and knew that I had to do it. My goal originally was to look perfect and I am not perfect still. Exposing that was scary. I had to remember my shifting goal of accepting myself now. I needed to be brave for those women that weren't yet. Whether people see those pictures or not, it is the energy. The vibe you are putting out there. Being open.

As I started, it was messy. I had downfalls. I would have a streak of working out and eating clean then I would fall off. I would do it again. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. The only thing that has been consistent is my mindset. That I knew no matter how many times I fell, I just needed to get back up. I needed to be the fighter. I had to trust myself because when you are changing your body for the better or better health, you are your own worst enemy and also best cheerleader.

I dabbled in a lot of things. Some things costed me a lot of money. Some stuff worked temporarily and some stuff didn't work at all...I had every opportunity to be discouraged. Exercise hurt at first. I was winded. I struggled. But I knew it couldn't always be that way. That one day I would be stronger and it would be OKAYYY! In my downtime I would browse motivational quotes on Pinterest or read helpful articles or books that would keep my mind fed. I realized it was more of a mental game than anything else. I would constantly look up new food ideas or ways to train. It was a part time job. No joke. It took a lot of preparation.

It wasn't until 2015 when my journey became simpler when I found Beachbody. Finally a simpler solution but also something that was sustainable. Thank goodness, I was OVER yo-yo dieting. I had gained some weight again...and was still looking for that right fit. That thing that was going to work for me. Beachbody offered community and I had never had that. Like sure, I had put my body through hell trying to get to where I was but I was still lacking that accountability. I worked out for 30 minutes a day and followed a simple meal plan. I loved that I could workout at home and that I could plug into a safe space online with others that were on similar paths to health freedom. The trainers cared so much and the meal plans didn't leave me feeling restricted. It was just what I needed. I needed steps, not leaps.

You see me now and you might get the misconception that it was easy or that it happened overnight and I am here to tell you that it was hard everyday. It took me quite some time to get to where I am now. I welcomed the challenge and when you do that, you have to take everything.

The good and the bad.

If this is your day 1 or day 827, please keep in mind that there is a whole support system out there for you and that you 100% can do this.

(kelmariewellness@gmail.com if you wanna chat)

Maybe you start with drinking more water. Then eating more veggies and less sweets. Every time you want chips out of habit, try eating a carrot. Maybe you start going for a walk in the evenings evening with your family or your pup. You could even remove salting your dishes you prepare or skip the added sweeteners in your coffee and opt for coconut milk. Whatever it is, any step in the right direction is a step and that counts.

It does not have to be all or nothing and you must be patient.

I hope that you know now, no matter what your day 1 looks like, that there is a space for you to grow.

Whether you have a long road ahead or are close to nailing that fitness routine, you got this.

Kelxox